Movie Review – Nothing But The Truth (2008)

Starring – Kate Beckinsale, Matt Dillon, Alan Alda
Director – Rod Luries
Domestic Gross – Direct to DVD
Running Time – 108 minutes

Nothing But The Truth is a Rod Lurie film that combines and fictionalizes two recent real-life cases. It is an intense political thriller that was not released in theaters due to the distributor’s economic issues and not the quality of the film. Kate Beckinsale was very believable as a reporter that outs a CIA operative and is then jailed for refusing to reveal her source. David Schwimmer is equally believable as her unsupportive and generally douchey husband. Dillon and Alda, who I normally like, are unfortunately just passable as the opposing lawyers in the case. The film runs a bit long, but that seems to be by design to highlight how long the protagonist is stuck in prison. Lurie proves once again that he belongs in the small, but elite club including Aaron Sorkin of guys that can get me to watch any political film that took the time to write.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

TV Review – Skins (2007) aired on BBC

Starring – Nicholas Hoult, Mike Bailey, Michelle Richardson, Dev Patel
Season – 1
# of Episodes – 10
Length of Episodes – 60 minutes

“Skins” is how teen melodrama should be. Oh, and it’s a constant reminder of how much American TV sucks. “Skins” aired their first season on the BBC in 2007. They tell the story of a group of college friends who date each other, drink, do drugs and god forbid have sex. You’ll have seen a few of the stars before. Nicholas Hoult starred in “About a Boy” and “Dev Patel” was actually cast for “Slumdog Millionaire” from his part on “Skins”. All the staples of teen melodrama are here… The kid who wants his best friend’s girlfriend. An affair with a teacher. But then they branch in to some more modern topics of discrimination based on sexual orientation or religion. “Skins” is a well crafted and interesting story of a group of friends surviving college. They are in Season 3 now so adopt a new guilty pleasure and pick up the first two seasons on DVD.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – His Name Was Jason: 30 Years of Friday the 13th (2008)

Starring –
Director – Daniel Farrands
Domestic Gross – Direct to DVD
Running Time – 90 minutes

Released just before the most recent Friday the 13th this retrospective is more than just a promo. They do a great job of combining original footage, stories from cast members and famous fans. Plus, it’s always fun to look back at the 80’s originals. There’s some really funny stuff from Seth Green and James Roday talking about growing up with Jason. Even if you’re a passive Friday the 13th fan this is worth the 90 minutes.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Hamlet 2 (2008)

Starring – Steve Coogan, Catherine Keener, Amy Poehler
Director – Andrew Flemming
Domestic Gross – $4,886,216
Running Time – 92 minutes

After an unsuccessful acting career Dana Marschz (Coogan) becomes a high school drama teacher directing quirky adaptations of Hollywood movies. After being told that the drama budget was being cut and that this would be his last performance he decided to go out on top with some of this own material. That “original” material is Hamlet 2 a sequel to the Shakespeare classic. For those unaware Hamlet dies at the end. So, Marschz’s version involves a time machine and Jesus among other liberties. This sounds really quirky and fun, but in reality it’s just one joke over and over for 90+ minutes. I was really excited to see this when I first saw the trailer and heard the premise, but was sorely let down. There are enough indie comedies out there if you’re in the mood for one so… skip this one.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Bottle Shock (2008)

Starring – Randall Miller
Director – Alan Rickman, Chris Pine, Bill Pullman, Rachael Taylor, Freddy Rodriguez
Domestic Gross – $4,078,607
Running Time – 93 minutes

Bottle Shock is the true story of how California wines began to be taken seriously on the world stage. It stars Bill Pullman as Jim Barrett the owner of Chateau Montelena, a fledgling winery. He is assisted by his general screw-up son Bo played by Chris Pine and his best friend Gustavo (Rodriguez). Alan Rickman plays Steven Spurrier an ex-pat Brit living in France and running his own wine store. In an effort to stock his store with the finest wines he travels to California to test the new offerings from the Americans. Along the way he collects samples to bring back to France and display in an open wine competition. While I didn’t expect to enjoy this Pine and Rodriquez were great together and it had a little “Miracle” feel where we’re rooting for the Americans. On the whole though it was just okay. I honestly don’t have any major complaints, but on that same token there’s nothing to rave about either.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – American Teen (2008)

Starring – It’s essentially reality so there’s nobody you’ve ever heard of…
Director – Nanette Burstein
Domestic Gross – $942,441
Running Time – 95 minutes

A reality movie. I know… some of you call that a documentary, but no… this is a reality movie. Essentially Nanette Burstein goes to Warsaw, Indiana and chronicles the lives of 4 high school seniors. The film begins the first day of school and extends right through graduation. That’s really all you need to know. They marketed it as the reality Breakfast Club and I suppose that’s somewhat true, but it felt a lot more like a long episode of MTV’s True Life: I’m a High School Senior. That’s not necessarily a bad thing if you’re in to reality. Which if you are I would recommend this. Otherwise, it’s really not worth the effort… There’s nothing groundbreaking here.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Nobel Son (2008)

Starring – Alan Rickman, Bryan Greenberg, Shawn Hatosy, Mary Steenburgen
Director – Randall Miller
Domestic Gross – $540,382
Running Time – 110 minutes

Alan Rickman is at his best when playing a douche bag. Score… Here he plays a Nobel Prize winning physicist who is so self-involved he really seems to dislike his family. Bryan Greenberg plays the son that can’t quite measure up and stopped trying by going in to the academic field of cannibalistic studies. Steenburgen rounds out the family as the dutiful wife that holds the family somewhat together and a renowned academic in her own right. A bizarre kidnapping plot is followed by revelation after revelation each one crazier than the last. This is a true black comedy. Some of the twists are a bit far-fetched but the ending is satisfying enough for the effort.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009)

Starring – Hugh Jackman, Liev Schreiber
Director – Gavin Hood
Domestic Gross – $99,152,810 (as of May 6)
Running Time – 107 minutes

Let me preface everything by saying that I do not know the comic book plotline for Wolverine and watched this simply as a fan of the character from the previous three films.

Origins? That’s what the title says, right? So, where the hell did Wolverine come from? Why does he have claws? Sure, they tell us how his skeleton was transformed to adamantium, but nobody tells us why he was a mutant in the first place. The movie starts pre-Civil War and a child is shown with bones that will extend from the knuckles like claws. He also heals extremely quickly. He and his brother are then immediately in their 30’s and fighting in war after war (as shown in the trailer). So, what I want to know is why were they mutants to begin with? The previous movies make these mutations out to be a somewhat recent historical occurrence… not 200 years in the past. Then somebody tell me why he’s a kid and then 35, but then never ages again. Remove my logical questions and it’s just an entertaining Summer film. Good times and crazy action. Plus, Taylor Kitsch is pretty baddass as Gambit. Go in looking for a good time and you’ll enjoy it… Just don’t try to find an origin in the story.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – The Express (2008)

Starring – Rob Brown, Dennis Quaid
Director – Gary Fleder
Domestic Gross – $9,793,406
Running Time – 129 minutes

"The Express" is the story of the greatest running back you’ve probably never heard of… Ernie Davis. Davis followed Jim Brown at Syracuse and became the first African-American to win the Heisman Trophy. Ernie Davis faced tremendous racism en route to a stellar career at Syracuse and dealt with it with class (see Jackie Robinson) thereby paving the way for all those to follow. Unfortunately, Davis never had a chance to play in the NFL due to serious health issues that resulted in his life ending all too soon. I have been a football fan all my life and prior to this movie had never heard of Ernie Davis. This is the best kind of biopic. It tells a poignant and entertaining story of someone you should have heard of, but may never had. At over 2 hours you could make the case that it’s a little too long, but I never found myself looking at the clock. Definitely check this one out, but expect it to get dusty in the end like Brian’s Song.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Star Trek - IMAX (2009)

Starring – Chris Pine, Zachary Quinto, Zoe Saldana
Director – JJ Abrams
Domestic Gross – $79,204,289 (as of 5/10/09)
Running Time – 126 minutes

Prior to going to Star Trek I heard some terrifying words from friends and reviewers… “alternate timeline”. That’s usually a cheap way to mess with history and is generally done poorly. Not the case with Abrams’ Star Trek. This was a well done reboot and is now less geeky sci-fi then kickass space action movie. See this movie within the next 10 days while it is still at IMAX. I grew up watching the original Trek movies and loved Next Generation. My fiancé hates roughly all things sci-fi. So, having brought her I think I got a good read on the film from a fan (me) and a hater (her). We both walked out loving it. The timeline thing can get a little confusing, but they took a second here and there to explain. Pine is perfect to play the young Kirk constantly womanizing and jumping in to action before realizing consequences. Quinto was fantastic as a young Spock. I always thought Spock would have been a little more reckless in his youth and Quinto nailed it. In any case I’m looking forward to their next effort tentatively scheduled for 2011. I remember the geek-filled excitement the first time I saw the new Trek trailer almost a year ago where they were working on Enterprise in a dry-dock so I guess the best compliment I can give to this is that it lived up to that excitement for all 126 minutes.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Cadillac Records (2008)

Starring – Adrien Brody, Jeffrey Wright, Gabrielle Union, Columbus Short
Director – Darnell Martin
Domestic Gross – $8,195,551
Running Time – 108 minutes

Cadillac Records attempts to tell the story of Chess Records in an entertaining fashion. The subject matter is there. Chess Records was to Blues what Atlantic was to R&B with a stable of musicians that included Etta James, Muddy Waters, Howlin’ Wolf and Bo Diddley among others. Unfortunately the film starred Adrien Brody as Leonard Chess and he just mailed it in playing sleezy more than anything. They completely ignored the existence of Bo Diddley. Now, the good. The music was done extremely well. Beyonce really nailed Etta James in her version of At Last. To boil it down though this would have been better as a tribute concert than a movie. Don’t bother. Just check out the soundtrack instead.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – I Love You, Man (2009)

Starring – Paul Rudd, Jason Segel, Rashida Jones
Director – John Hamburg
Domestic Gross – $68,570,273
Running Time – 110 minutes

Absolutely hilarious! I get that it’s manufactured to capitalize on the “bromance” movement in pop culture, but anytime you put Rudd and Segel on screen they are going to find the funny. Rudd is excellent as the straight man with Segel being more overtly funny. Rashida Jones is great as the open girlfriend as well. In their bit roles Andy Samberg and JK Simmons are hysterical. As for the plot Peter (Rudd) is a man that gets a little too wrapped up in his relationships to the point that he has no guy friends. When it comes time to pick a wedding party he is hit with this realization and decides to pursue making friends. In that effort he meets Sydney and they bond over their love of Rush. Hilarity ensues. I wouldn’t say it’s on the level with Role Models, but it’s a great date movie that you both can enjoy.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Synecdoche, New York (2009)

Starring – Philip Seymour Hoffman, Catherine Keener, Samantha Morton
Director – Charlie Kaufman
Domestic Gross – $3,083,538
Running Time – 124 minutes

Charlie Kaufman is bat shit crazy. I just sat here for about 5 minutes considering leaving that as my entire review. All the reviews online of this film describe it as “difficult, but genius” or “a true allegory”. What that says to me is that this movie is nonsense and nobody wants to be the one to admit that they didn’t get it. Well, I didn’t get it. There was a house perpetually on fire and minuscule art as well as a to scale set of New York City. I could not have been more confused or less entertained. In conclusion... Charlie Kaufman is bat shit crazy.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Bedtime Stories (2008)

Starring – Adam Sandler, Keri Russell, Russell Brand, Courtney Cox
Director – Adam Shankman
Domestic Gross – $110,101,975
Running Time – 95 minutes

Bedtime Stories is a Sandler vehicle for kids. Like any Adam Sandler movie the plot is secondary to the funny. In this one the irresponsible Skeeter Bronson (Sandler) has to babysit his niece and nephew while their mom (Courtney Cox) is out of town. Together they spin these crazy tales at bedtime that begin coming true. Unfortunately for Skeeter only what the kid’s come up with comes true. It’s a ridiculous fun romp that is probably fantastic for kids under 10 and reasonably entertaining for those over. Russell Brand is hilarious in his bit part as Skeeter’s best friend with narcolepsy and night terrors. Beyond that it’s just another ridiculous kid’s movie that is easily forgotten within a week.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Rachel Getting Married (2008)

Starring – Anne Hathaway, Rosemarie DeWitt, Bill Irwin
Director – Jonathan Demme
Domestic Gross – $12,796,841
Running Time – 114 minutes

This is probably the most real portrayal of a family wedding ever put on the big screen. Written by Jenny Lumet (daughter of the great Sydney Lumet) and directed by Jonathan Demme. This film runs 20-40 minutes longer than it probably should, but it does add to the reality. Demme spends a lot of time with background and establishing shots. At one point there is a ten minute montage of the wedding with nothing plot-related. Anne Hathaway is fantastic as the former model and addict returning from rehab for her sister’s wedding. The real surprise is Rosemarie DeWitt. You’ve seen her in everything and she was becoming a “that girl”, but her performance in Rachel Getting Married really establishes her chops. She plays the very put together sister/bride. DeWitt and Hathaway take a story that is very simple and straightforward and power it in to truly fantastic film. Be advised there are some Office-like uncomfortable moments. Despite the title this is not the rom-com you were looking for for date night. Better for a hangover day. Enjoy.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Book Review – The Fires of Heaven (WoT) by Robert Jordan (1993)

In the 5th book of Robert Jordan’s Wheel of Time he continues to chronicle the actions of the Dragon Reborn, a former shepherd, now on the path to killing the Dark One and saving the world. Rather than give the entire plot suffice to say if you liked the first 4 you won’t be disappointed by The Fires of Heaven. This not a series you can jump in to in the middle. It would be maddening with all the names and different peoples. Some major characters are seemingly killed in this volume and shift the power. It’s kind of difficult to review without giving the plot, but the bottom line is that if you are a fan of fantasy like Lord of the Rings give this series a shot. The first book is the only one that can really act as a stand alone so you can always stop there if it’s not for you.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Book Review – Strangewood by Christopher Golden (2007)

Strangewood is the story of a fantasy author’s imagination come alive. TJ Randall created Strangewood as a child dealing with a tough home life. The characters were routed in reality, but the world he created was pure Tolkein fantasy. When he put this world on paper it became an international bestseller (think Harry Potter) that demanded sequel after sequel. After a while he was just going through the motions, but not really imagining the stories. The world became darker and over time less stable. Finally the inhabitants of Strangewood felt the only way to keep their world alive was to force TJ Randall to return to them… By kidnapping his son. If it sounds a little weird that’s because it is, but in the end it was a really cool story and only about 300 pages. If you’re in to fantasy at all this is a worthy summer read.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – JCVD (2008)

Starring – Jean-Claude Van Damme
Director – Mabrouk El Mechri
Domestic Gross – $470,691
Running Time – 92 minutes

HELL YEAH Van Damme is back! JCVD is the tale of Van Damme’s life falling in to the shitter and just at the lowest point after he loses a role to a ponytail-less Seagal he is pulled in to a bank robbery. The robbers use him to talk to the cops and he becomes and accomplice while trying to escape alive. Sounds ridiculous, right? I guess it is a little, but supremely watchable. Make sure you’re not multi-tasking because it’s subtitled. I doubt this is the resurrection of a career for Van Damme, but his acting was surprisingly good. Hopefully we’ll see the Muscles from Brussels in a Bloodsport sequel.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Righteous Kill (2008)

Starring – Al Pacino, Robert DeNiro, Carla Gugino, Curtis “50 Cent” Jackson
Director – Jon Avnet
Domestic Gross – $40,081,410
Running Time – 101 minutes

I’m sorry. I need to apologize in advance. Why? Because I actually liked this. I realize that this may ruin any street cred I may (or may not) have earned as a critic, but look at it this way... I'm honest and will tell you how I really felt about a movie. I know Pacino and DeNiro are insane caricatures of their former selves. I don’t care. The plot was absurd, but the twists and turns were entertaining. Plus, 50 Cent was really good as the gangsta (stretch, right?). And ever since Son In Law I’ve had a tremendous thing for Carla Gugino. So, is this Oscar material? Of course not, but if you’re looking for mindless entertainment it’s definitely better than most of crap on television. Oh, and as a warning I think that all women will hate this movie. Just keep that in mind.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Twilight (2008)

Starring – Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson
Director – Catherine Hardwicke
Domestic Gross – $190,723,849
Running Time – 120 minutes

As an unabashed lover of all things teen melodrama you know I had to watch Twilight. Hell, I read the book. Generally, if you read the book first then you’re let down by the movie. That wasn’t the case here. This was more a companion that flushes out the book. The characters and scenery were extremely well done and true to the book. Kristen Stewart it an extremely talented actress. Her talents aren’t really on display given it’s a pretty simple role. As for Pattinson as a straight male I don’t think he’s good-looking enough to play Edward. The book describes him as the best looking man alive. I guess because every teenage girl thinks their crush is the hottest thing alive I’ll let it go. I really think Hardwicke did a great job bringing the fantasy aspects to the screen given the budget constraints. I’ll be honest I’m not looking forward to the sequel. The Director is not involved and the source material is crap. So, check this one out and treat it as a stand alone.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Book Review – Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell (2008)

Malcolm Gladwell is back with another insightful non-fiction book. I really enjoyed Tipping Point and Blink. In Outliers Gladwell is attempting to identify why some people are successful while others of the same theoretical ability are not. His assumption comes down to opportunity that in many cases is completely out of the subject’s control. For example he delves in to why the majority of successful Canadian hockey players are born within the first 3 months of the year. What he finds is that Canadian youth hockey slots children based on year of birth. So, everyone born in 1980 is in the same level. So, starting out at 4 or 5 years old the kids born Jan-Mar are more developmentally advanced that those born in Oct-Dec. So, these kids are the best in the league at that young age. As a result they get the most coaching and ice time. Moving forward they are making the All-Star teams etc. So, Gladwell is saying that by being born in the latter half of the year you are less likely to get the attention to develop in to the player that they have could be. Now, this is just one of the examples he goes through many, but it’s definitely interesting. As always with Gladwell it tends to feel like common sense broken down to the n-th degree, but it’s totally worth the read.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Religulous (2008)

Starring – Bill Maher
Director – Larry Charles
Domestic Gross – $13,011,160
Running Time – 101 minutes

It’s well established that Bill Maher is an outspoken douche at times. But, regardless of his conviction of general douchebaggery he's always honest. The guy speaks his mind and isn’t at all concerned with the reactions of others. This particular documentary deals with the ridiculousness of religion on a worldwide scale. He doesn’t attack any one religion over another instead doing his best to poke holes in the mythology of all of them from the mainstream Judeo-Christian to Scientology. He feels that religion is a form of mental illness. While that’s a bit extreme to say the least he does spend the entire movie talking to various religious leaders more or less questioning their beliefs. At times regardless of whether or not you agree with them you start to empathize with the people his is interviewing because he is so condescending that the person could believe the Hamburgler is the second coming and you’ll just want Maher to leave them alone. The best part is when the guy who plays Jesus at Bibleland is discussing the Holy Trinity with Maher. Maher asks him how he can explain the same being as The Father, The Son and the Holy Spirit. He responds asking how Maher can explain water as liquid, solid and gas. It’s far from a perfect analogy, but he put Maher in his place for a second. Often times I disagree with Maher, but I really do enjoy him as a commentator and comedian. This film is worth watching if you can relax and enjoy it. It you’re a devout (insert religion here) skip it. You’ll only get pissed off.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Body of Lies (2008)

Starring – Leonardo DiCaprio, Russell Crowe
Director – Ridley Scott
Domestic Gross – $39,394,666
Running Time – 128 minutes

I love Ridley Scott films. I really enjoy DiCaprio and Crowe as actors. Why then did I just dislike this movie so much? Probably because it was terribly convoluted. Body of Lies was adapted from the novel of the same name by David Ignatius. I haven’t read the book, but I would wager that this story plays much better in print. The characters are in this country then another pursuing one terrorist after another. It’s really difficult to make a stand alone movie like that. A trilogy can do it because you can get invested in the character over time (think Bourne), but when you are introducing everything upfront and wanting the viewer to care about these characters it’s tough when they are already immersed in action. Technically speaking this is a well-made, well-acted film I just couldn’t get in to the story or the characters. Pass…


I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – The Wackness (2008)

Starring – Josh Peck, Ben Kingsley, Olivia Thirlby
Director – Jonathan Levine
Domestic Gross – $2,077,166
Running Time – 95 minutes

The Wackness is one of those straight to DVD (it did get a limited release, but it was never anywhere near Boston) films that makes me keep checking out straight to DVD releases. This is a story set in 1994 NYC about an oddball teenage pot dealer named Shapiro (Peck). His life is one of uncomfortable situations. He lacks the confidence to be better in school or with the ladies and at home his parents’ struggles in their own lives complicate his relationships with them. As a result he now trades weed for therapy with psychiatrist, Dr. Squires (Kingsley). The psychiatrist also happens to be the stepfather of a cute (read “out of his league”) girl from school named Stephanie played by Olivia Thirlby. It’s a simple if kinda ridiculous story with a phenomenal early 90s hip-hop soundtrack. There’s even a cameo from Method Man playing Shapiro’s Jamaican supplier. Kingsley is hilarious and touching as the troubled, drug addicted psychiatrist. Thirlby is cute and funny again. I loved her in Juno and she didn’t disappoint here. The real surprise though is Josh Peck. He played the little fat kid in one of my personal favorite guilty pleasures, Disney's Snow Day, and is better known for multiple shows on Nick, but the kid can act. I’m looking forward to seeing him in the future. The Wackness isn’t going to blow you away, but I really just enjoyed it throughout. If you’re looking for something a little out of the ordinary check it out.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008)

Starring – Keanu Reeves, Jennifer Connelly
Director – Scott Derickson
Domestic Gross – $79,239,505
Running Time – 104 minutes

Calling this movie a steaming pile of shit would be an insult to mounds of excrement everywhere. Why does Hollywood feel the need to take beloved movies and cast Keanu Reeves in the remake?!?! I’m not opposed to updating a movie. Especially Sci-Fi classics. With the right actors you are taking something that already has a solid plotline and using the advances in special effects to create a product greater than the original. By casting Keanu Reeves you fail to do that. The original is a very simple film that has some Christian overtones. The update appears to have been produced by Al Gore. That’s my other complaint. If you’re going to remake a movie then remake it. If you want to take some of the ideas and make a different movie then do that. No need to use the same name just to attract an audience. Bottom line… I’m really happy I was multi-tasking while watching this because at least something was accomplished with the time.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Role Models (2008)

Starring – Paul Rudd, Seann William Scott, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Bobb’e J Thompson
Director – David Wain
Domestic Gross – 67,294,270
Running Time – 95 minutes

You know when you watch a trailer and they show all the funny parts? This isn’t one of those. This movie is hilarious. Little Bobb’e Thompson nearly steals the show with his barrage of grown-up comments. This really is the best kind of comedy where it’s really funny throughout, but there is a legitimate plotline. Of course, the impetus for everything is absurd, but once they’ve established the need for community service the rest really flows through to the resolution. Paul Rudd is fantastic. He can play everything from the critical straight man to Kunu the surfing instructor. And while Seann William Scott is really only playing Stiffler at age 28 he is entertaining as well. McLovin’ may be nearing the end of his career. I just can’t see how he can play anything else. Hopefully, he’ll prove me wrong because the kid can play uncomfortable as well as anyone, but between his geeky looks and lisp and I just don’t see him parlaying this in to a career. At this point I’ve seen the movie twice in a short period and both times I laughed out loud. Definitely check this one out soon.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Still Waiting (2009)

Starring – John Michael Higgins, Alanna Uboch, Maggie Lawson
Director – Jeff Balis
Domestic Gross – Direct to DVD
Running Time – 90 minutes

This is the Direct-to-DVD sequel to 2005’s surprisingly funny Waiting starring Justin Long, Ryan Reynolds and Anna Farris. Still Waiting picks up a few years in the future with many of the same players (read lesser known actors) still working at Shenanigans. I always struggle with what to expect from Direct-to-DVD stuff. I really enjoyed Waiting, but if this sequel was really good why didn’t it get a release? Then again, I think the newer American Pie DVDs are hilarious and they didn’t get a release. So, what to expect from this?! Nothing much. Like the previous installment if you ever worked in food service you’ll think this is a lot funnier than if you didn’t. Unfortunately, a lot of the jokes are recycled and not so good the second time around. So, if you ever worked in a restaurant it’s worth the rental since it’s decent enough. I know… Not much of a recommendation, but while I don’t have too much good to say I really don’t have all that much bad either. Just a neutral effort.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Dead Like Me: Life After Death (2009)

Starring – Ellen Muth, Callum Blue, Jasmine Guy, Sarah Wynter
Director – Stephen Herek
Domestic Gross – Direct to DVD
Running Time – 90 minutes

The aptly named Life After Death picks up on the canceled Showtime series Dead Like Me a few years after we left the characters. They are still grim reapers snatching souls just before death so that those souls may go in to the light. The movie holds to the dark comedy roots of the series employing many of the main players including Ellen Muth, Callum Blue and Jasmine Guy. Unfortunately Many Patinkin passed on reprising his role and the film really suffered as a result. The story revolves around his replacement and how the group adjusts (or doesn’t), but it’s still just a fun long episode. I really loved this series and was sad to see it canceled. So, while it is flawed I was still just happy to catch up with the characters again. If you get the chance pick up the Dead Like Me Complete Box Set. That way you can check out the series and then the movie. I definitely don’t recommend it as a stand alone.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Quarantine (2008)

Starring – Jennifer Carpenter, Steve Harris, Jay Hernandez
Director – John Erick Dowdle
Domestic Gross – $31,691,811
Running Time – 89 minutes

First, I’ve never seen the original 2007 film from Spain so I have nothing to compare this to other than the run of the mill horror/thrillers. Having said that I really felt that this trite 28 Days Later in a firehouse was a terrible waste of time. Horror movies are known for terrible acting, but they got two reasonably good actors with Steve Harris and Jay Hernandez and then ruined them by having them work with Jennifer Carpenter. She just can’t seem to find the mood in any scene. This is also true of her work on Showtime’s Dexter. Between her and the awful storyline just pass on this one.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message

Movie Review – Flash of Genius (2008)

Starring – Greg Kinnear, Lauren Graham
Director – Marc Abraham
Domestic Gross – $4,442,377
Running Time – 119 minutes

What do you get when you try to tell the story of the man that invented the intermittent windshield wiper? A boring albeit endearing story. Kinnear plays engineering professor Robert Kearns in Detroit circa 1965. He realizes on his was home from church with the family one Sunday that when it’s only raining a little the wipers cause more of a distraction than the rain and wouldn’t it work better if you could slow them down. He adopts this as a pet project and develops the intermittent wiper. Unfortunately, when he demos this for Ford they go and steal the invention. He spends the next 25 years battling to get credit for his invention. The film was about 30 minutes too long, but other than that it was well-acted (which is tough to say about a Greg Kinnear movie) and an interesting true story. Lauren Graham was charming as usual. If you’re a bit of an engineering geek check it out. Otherwise, it may be a bit too long for you to enjoy and there are plenty of other David vs. Goliath tales.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Bolt (2008)

Starring – John Travolta, Miley Cyrus
Director – Brian Howard, Chris Williams
Domestic Gross – $114,053,579
Running Time – 96 minutes

Bolt is a rescue dog starring in his own show with his best person Penny. They battle evil using Penny’s smarts and Bolt’s superpowers. The Director of this show is really in to method so he has made sure that Bolt has been raised since he was a puppy to believe that the show is actually his life and he really does possess superpowers. This is fine until one day Bolt gets out and has to fend for himself. From there Bolt gets a reality slap and has to find his way across country to get back to Penny without superpowers.

This is really a great kids movie that has just enough laughs to keep the adults interested. Next time you have to babysit pick this one up. Definitely worth the rental.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – The Safety of Objects (2003)

Starring – Glenn Close, Kristen Stewart, Dermot Mulroney, Josh Jackson
Director – Rose Troche
Domestic Gross – $319,299
Running Time – 121 minutes

Four suburban families and their issues overlap in Troche’s The Safety of Objects. There are stars all over the place from Glenn Close to Timothy Olyphant to Kristen Stewart in her film debut. The acting and direction are both very well done. The story is just a bit too odd and depressing form my taste. I could really see how some people would love this though. One character has a nervous breakdown and dedicates himself to helping people he’s never even met to win a truck in a radio contest. Just a little off. I won’t recommend it, but I will say there’s an audience out there for it (see Requiem for a Dream) so check it out at your own risk.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – The Foot Fist Way (2008)

Starring – Danny McBride, Ben Best
Director – Jody Hill
Domestic Gross – $234,286
Running Time – 85 minutes

Danny McBride is hilarious is small doses. He was outstanding in Tropic Thunder and Hot Rod. Unfortunately, Danny McBride in large doses is a little too much. To me Danny McBride is Tequila. One of two shots of Patron is the makings of a good night. A bottle is BAD. Foot Fist is the story of a small town martial arts instructor and his struggles with his cheating wife and idol worship. There are some good laughs, but it really doesn’t hold up for 85 minutes. Pass unless you’re drinking with the boys. I’m sure it’s funnier then… On the bright side even if you don’t like it it’s only 85 minutes.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Sex Drive (2008)

Starring – Josh Zuckerman, Clark Duke, Amanda Crew, James Marsden, Seth Green
Director – Sean Anders
Domestic Gross – $8,402,485
Running Time – 109 minutes

REWATCH. I wrote a review of this last year, but I just watched Sex Drive again and I don’t think enough people have seen it. This movie is hilarious. Clark Duke is one of the greatest comedic characters since Stiffler in American Pie 1 (not 2 or 3 where he was a caricature of himself). James Marsden and Seth Green are both laugh out loud funny in the limited screen time they have. Sex Drive is billed as an update of The Sure Thing and to some extent it is in that the two main characters take a road trip and you know 5 minutes in to the movie that they will end up together. Beyond that though the movies have little in common. Next time you are looking for a comedy pick this one up. You won’t be disappointed if only for Clark Duke.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – I Think I Love My Wife (2007)

Starring – Chris Rock, Gina Torres, Kerry Washington
Director – Chris Rock
Domestic Gross – $12,550,605
Running Time – 90 minutes

I Think I Love My Wife is the story of a man who gets bored with his seemingly perfect life and begins to stray. Along the way he finds out that his life isn’t so bad. The End. Seriously, that’s about it. There are a couple funny scenes that could have come straight from Rock or Louis CK’s act, but all in all it’s just exceptionally trite albeit well acted. Oh, and Kerry Washington is super hot. Go back and watch Chris Rock – Bigger and Black and Louis CK’s Shameless instead of this. Trust me.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Ghost Writer (2007)

Starring – Alan Cumming, David Boreanaz
Director – Alan Cumming
Domestic Gross – Direct to DVD
Running Time – 100 minutes

I really should stop watching Direct to DVD movies and expecting good things. I enjoy both Boreanaz and Cumming so I figured I’d give it a shot. The story is that Boreanaz is a terrible writer who wrote a novel, but can’t seem to get any traction. He preys on Cumming’s charity and lives in his place without any thought of compensation etc. Let’s not forget that Cumming is a repressed homosexual that yearns for Boreanaz despite his being a rampant heterosexual. Finally, Cumming snaps and kills him in a very elaborate manor involving women’s underwear and other humiliations. Before his death though he gave the novel to a publisher saying that Cumming wrote it. It made less sense in the movie than it does here. Regardless, the publisher thinks that this novel is brilliant in it’s simplicity and lack of proper grammar so Cumming becomes a massive success through the work of his now dead houseguest. The overacting is tremendous. Both characters are supposed to be over the top, but they are so far over the top that this movie was sent straight to DVD. Learn from my mistakes and skip it.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Illegal Tender (2007)

Starring – Rick Gonzalez, Wanda De Jesus,
Director – Franc Reyes
Domestic Gross – $3,106,835
Running Time – 108 minutes

In the early 80s Wilson Deleon, Sr. was an up and coming gangster in NYC. Unfortunately, he got a little too much power for his boss and was assassinated. Before he was killed he had skimmed a little money and given it to his family. After his death his wife and son fled with the money. Illegal Tender picks up 20 years later with Wilson Jr coming to terms with his family’s past and trying to reconcile things so that they can have a future. Rick Gonzalez was surprisingly good as Wilson Jr. I’ve always liked him in comedic roles from Old School to Reaper, but I wasn’t sure he had the chops for dramatic roles. He does. Unfortunately, that’s where the praise ends. Dania Ramirez play Ana (Wilson’s girlfriend) and is one of the all-time most annoying wet blanket girlfriends in cinema history. When there are killers scouring the house looking for her and Wilson she is screaming and bitching about the situation instead of hiding etc. She just sucks in every possible way. This character really detracted from the movie for me. I know… It’s such a small thing, but I was so distracted by it that I found myself annoyed minutes after she was off screen. This isn’t to say that Ramirez’ acting was bad. It’s just the character was terribly written and annoying. Wanda De Jesus’ character (mom) was nearly as bad. This girl who was the smartest in her high school class somehow made the thousands that were stolen in to millions that could last a lifetime AND be a badass with a weapon?! Sorry. That’s where I checked out. Avoid this one.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – RockNRolla (2008)

Starring – Gerard Butler, Idris Elba, Tom Wilkinson, Thandie Newton
Director – Guy Ritchie
Domestic Gross – $5,700,626
Running Time – 114 minutes

Guy Ritchie may be the definition of a one-trick pony. Snatch was awesome. Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels was very good. Since then Revolver and RockNRolla have been pale comparisons to his previous successes. He continues to get top flight actors in to his snappy Brit crime dramedies, but the problem is that the stories just aren’t that compelling. All the performances in RockNRolla are fine. Idris Elba and Thandie Newton are great. There are even some laughs along the way, but it’s just not worth 2 hours of your time. That said apparently I still haven’t smartened up because I’m still excited to see what he does with the upcoming Sherlock Holmes revival starring Robert Downey, Jr. and Rachel McAdams.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Pineapple Express (2008)

Starring – Seth Rogan, James Franco
Director – David Gordon Green
Domestic Gross – $87,341,380
Running Time – 105 minutes

Everybody loved this movie. This was one of the first “stoner” movies I can remember that got positive reviews from mainstream critics. My question is… Why? It was okay. The story was interesting enough, but again my question is why the universal praise for just an okay movie? Many comedy movies suffer because the acting is sub-par. Aside from Rosie Perez and her general suckiness everyone in this movie can actually act. Franco’s Golden Globe nomination was well deserved. But, aside from Danny McBride it just wasn’t that funny. It was more of a buddy action movie that just never hit its stride. I will have to admit that I mine expectations were probably overly high due to all the positive reviews, but even still I just didn’t think it was worth all the love. Bottom line is it’s a fun movie. It’s good enough, but if you’re feenin’ for something from the Apatow collection go back and watch Sarah Marshall or 40 Year Old Virgin again.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (2008)

Starring – Brad Pitt, Cate Blanchett, Taraji P. Henson
Director – Eric Roth
Domestic Gross – $123,299,000
Running Time – 168 minutes

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button is the fanciful tale of a baby born in 1919 as an old man and then aging backwards. There’s no revelation as to why so don’t go in and expect that. What you will find is an interesting, albeit LONG, fantasy love story. Before I get in to the plot etc this is a beautiful film. The cinematography is outstanding. And the make-up may be best make-up I’ve ever seen in a movie. Brad Pitt is more or less playing Brad Pitt, but I’m not sure what I would have had him do differently. He was honest and heartwarming. Cate Blanchett (as always) is outstanding. Taraji B. Henson has her best performance since Common’s Testify Video. Ted Manson nearly steals the show in about 2 minutes of screen time as the old man who was hit by lightning 7 times. The film spans from World War I to Hurricane Katrina and you never feel like the timing is off. Benjamin Button is a very well-made fun film. Save it for a rainy Sunday and enjoy.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – The Reader (2008)

Starring – Kate Winslet, Ralph Feinnes, David Kross
Director – Stephen Daldry
Domestic Gross – $21,074,000
Running Time – 122 minutes

WOW! A sympathetic Nazi movie… Really?!?! I grant you that Kate Winslet is the hottest Nazi since Elsa – She Wolf of the SS, but do we really want to forgive her for putting time in at Auschwitz because she looks good naked and can’t read?! This should not have been a Best Picture nominee. And honestly, Kate Winslet probably didn’t need to be nominated. At this point Winslet has been nominated for 6 Oscars, but do you consider her the best actress of her generation? I’ve never walked out of a Winslet movie and been wowed by her performance. While Cate Blanchett impresses me every time I see her on screen. More on that with my Benjamin Button review later. Anyway, the best performance in the movie for my money was David Kross, a relatively unknown 18 year old German actor. All that aside this is a difficult movie. It’s not a romance. It’s not a Holocaust movie. I’m not sure it fits in any category. It’s the story of a young man’s affair with who he later finds out is a former SS guard. Not so much a fell good movie. While I didn’t hold that against it I still don’t feel it was really that great a film. It’s good. It’s worthy of a viewing, but it is not Oscar caliber.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Milk (2008)

Starring – Sean Penn, James Franco, Josh Brolin, Emile Hirsch
Director – Gus Van Sant
Domestic Gross – $27,318,000
Running Time – 128 minutes

I guess I didn’t know what to expect when I sat down for Milk. All I knew about the story was what I had heard in passing so… Milk dies and it brought about the “twinkie defense”. Beyond that he was a gay activist who got elected to office in SF. But, with Sean Penn starring I really didn’t know if I’d enjoy it. Sean Penn is one of the finest actors alive, but he’s also incredibly annoying publicly and chooses some real odd ball films. This isn’t one of them. At times he does channel his character from I Am Sam, but I honestly don’t think anyone else could have effectively played this part. Franco was outstanding as well. I’ve been watching Franco since Freaks and Geeks and I’ve never been real sure that he could actually act. I thought he was more a James Dean look-alike who got by on that. He proves it in Milk hands down. Josh Brolin was very effective as well as Dan White. I’m not so sure he’s Oscar-worthy, but he was good. Like I said… I’m not sure what I was expecting when I sat down, but what I got was a truly fantastic film that would be the odds on favorite for Best Picture in any other year. Regardless of your politics take a look at Milk when it hits DVD on March 10th.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Book Review – Too Cool to be Forgotten by Alex Robinson (2008)

The premise here is that Andy Wicks, a truly average 40-something software engineer, goes to the hypnotist to quit smoking. Only when they put him under he wakes up back in 1985 just before he has his first cigarette. In his previous trip thought high school he lacked confidence and was pretty much a forgettable geek. This time though he has the confidence and wisdom of a 40-year-old man. Using this he gets a date and chooses not to smoke thereby quitting in the present. Unfortunately, I just told the entire story in three sentences and you didn’t miss anything in the plot. What you did miss is Robinson’s fantastic artwork. The level of detail in each cell is very impressive. But, the story telling is more or less unimpressive. In the end Alex Robinson is a fantastic artist that either needs to draw for someone else or grow as a storyteller. Regardless, I’ll check out his next effort.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Dreams for an Insomniac (1996)

Starring – Ione Skye, Jennifer Aniston, Michael Landes
Director – Tiffany DeBartolo
Domestic Gross – Direct to DVD
Running Time – 90 minutes

If you’re dating an artsy-philosophical lady (or man I suppose) or an actress go rent this for a date night. Otherwise, there’s really not a good reason to subject yourself to it other than to see Jennifer Aniston at the apex of her hotness. Yeah, she still looks good, but this was Rachel at her best. As for the movie it’s an interesting little indie that just tries way too hard. Everyone is quoting obscure poetry and literature and the other characters know exactly where the quote comes from. Now, I hang out with some true champions when it comes to trivial knowledge and I can pretty much guarantee that no one would get more than 25% of these quotes. My other major issue is that in order for the main character to get what she wants you need to root for the breakup of a perfectly likeable couple. It makes you feel a little smarmy if you actually root for them. Like I said there’s not a great reason to watch this one unless you’re taking one for the team in order to get your significant other to go to the new Friday the 13th in exchange.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Friday the 13th (2009)

Starring – Jared Padalecki, Amanda Righetti, Danielle Panabaker
Director – Marcus Nispel
Domestic Gross – Just released.
Running Time – 97 minutes

When I heard that they were trying to reboot the Friday the 13th franchise I was a little worried. When I heard Michael Bay was involved I was a little more than curious. So, when I got a call to go see it last night (on Friday the 13th) I had to do it. True 80’s horror movies have 3 elements. First, there must be gratuitous nudity (check). Second, there must be a lack of plot or flushed out / believable back story (check). Finally, you need roughly a 50/50 mix between comedy and suspense-type jump scares (check, check, check). I had a great time watching this movie. Is it a cinematic masterpiece. No. But what the hell are you going in expecting Citizen Kane for?!? This is a Michael Bay produced Friday the 13th movie. Go in expecting to laugh out loud, see some needless nudity and jump in to your neighbor’s seat a couple times. If you do that you’ll have a good time. I really recommend this movie to anyone who enjoys the 80s Horror genre.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Babylon A.D. (2008)

Starring – Vin Diesel,
Director – Mathieu Kassovitz
Domestic Gross – $22,532,572
Running Time – 90 minutes

I feel like I haven’t seen a good movie in a while. Luckily the Oscar Showcase is only a week away. This movie SUCKED! It’s no wonder that it lost $50 Million domestically and scored a whopping 7% on Rotten Tomatoes. After some research I found out that the director was also unhappy with the movie because the studio more or less killed it. Bottom line is that unless you’re a big fan of snowmobile chases or furutustic sets (ie Children of Men) there’s very little reason to waste the 90 minutes. It’s too bad too because I think there was a decent movie buried somewhere deep in this steaming pile of crap.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review - Neo Ned (2005)

Starring – Jeremy Renner, Gabrielle Union, Cary Elwes, Ethan Suplee, Eddie Kaye Thomas
Director – Van Fischer
Domestic Gross – Direct to DVD
Running Time - 95 minutes

A neo-Nazi (Renner) is sent to a mental hospital where he falls in love with a black woman who believes she is Hitler. Now, that’s a tag line. Seriously. That’s a pretty fantastic concept. Whatever you’re picturing in your head for this movie is probably better than the actual film. That’s not to say it’s bad, but it’s a pretty genius concept that’s hard to live up to. I’ve always had a thing for Gabrielle Union, but in this movie the make-up team worked pretty hard to make her look unattractive. Good work team. Renner seems to underachieve in everything he’s ever been in… I’m just not a fan. Suplee and Eddie Kaye Thomas are really very entertaining though. I wouldn’t take the time to rent it, but if you happen to be watching Starz in Black and it comes on give it a few minutes. You may enjoy it.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Yes Man (2008)

Starring – Jim Carrey, Zooey Deschanel
Director – Peyton Reed
Domestic Gross – $95,840,000
Running Time – 104 minutes

About two years ago a read a book by a Brit named Danny Wallace called “Yes Man”. Danny was single, late 20s, employed and completely stuck in a rut. He would make up excuses not to hang out with his friends. Not because he didn’t like them, but because it was too much trouble to go out and he didn’t see the point in all of it. Then one day he was sitting on a bus stuck in traffic and started rambling to an old man about his current situation. The old man looked at him and replied “You should say yes more.” That was it. Somehow Danny turned this in to a covenant with himself to say yes to everything. What ensued was funny and endearing. I can tell you all of this because none of this is in the movie “Yes Man”. Instead they took the most basic skeleton from the movie and created a Jim Carrey vehicle. Having said all that I liked it. I enjoy Jim Carrey and really adore Zooey Deschanel. I was just hoping it would be more based on the book then a skewed homage to it. There were some particularly funny parts mostly involving Carrey’s boss, neighbor and imprompt roommate (played by Danny Masterson). It’s worth a rental, but I’m glad I skipped it in theaters. Instead use the time to start reading the book.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Book Review – Too Fat to Fish by Artie Lange (2008)

Quite simply after reading this book I have one question… Why would a just God give Artie Lange chance after chance to get clean/sober and let him live while taking greater talents like Farley and Belushi? Before I read this I expected something funny. Not a long letter from Step 8 of Alcoholics Anonymous. More or less Lange is writing a memoir of every shitty thing he’s ever done. Most of them not funny. Tucker Max’s shenanigans = funny. Artie Lange’s = sad and tragic. I spent the majority of this book shaking my head angrily at his stupidity (much like I did while reading Into the Wild) and feeling bad for his family (much like I did while reading Into the Wild). Artie Lange was great in Dirty Work. Aside from that he’s been wasted talent. And this book… a waste of my time.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Book Review – White Night by Jim Butcher (2008)

Book 9 of The Dresden Files

Like I said while reviewing the last Dresden novel it is fairly formulaic. Think of it as an episode of Monk only he’s a wizard. It starts with the conclusion of a previous case (kinda like a Bond movie where you come in just at the end of the last mission). Then he starts in on a new case. In this one it is that someone is killing all the magic practitioners in the Chicago area. As he investigates he fins that someone we’ve met before is behind it and all hell breaks loose. While some of the Dresden books can be read as one-offs this one isn’t it. A lot of the characters come from previous books and there isn’t a whole lot of recap to catch you up. As a result to the dedicated reader this book is the best one so far. I’m always annoyed when the author retells everything from the previous books dumbing it down for a new reader. It’s just a waste of my time since I alerady read it. Anyway, without ruining the plot the showdown is probably the best one so far. A lot of series start to lose their luster after time, but even nine books in I would recommend beginning the series to anyone who things they can get in to the crime/thriller/supernatural genre.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review – Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog (2008)

Starring – NPH, Nathon Fillion, Felicia Day & Simon Helberg
Director – Joss Whedon
Domestic Gross – Unreleased
Running Time - 42 minutes

I’m an unabashed lover of all things Whedon. I’m also a huge NPH fan. So, it’s not surprising that I loved Dr. Horrible. During the writer’s strike last year Joss Whedon put together this project and released it for free online in three acts. After watching the first one I heard that it would be released on DVD so I stopped watching the rest and decided to wait. The other day I picked this up from Amazon (where it is being sold exclusively) and watched it immediately. Dr. Horrible is a musical that follows NPH as Dr. Horrible’s efforts to become a world renowned supervillian and be accepted in to the Evil League of Evil all while trying to impress the girl at the laundromat. Everyone is cast perfectly. NPH is outstanding. So, is Helberg in his minor role as “Moist” the less intimidating supervillian. It’s about the length of an hour-long TV show so definitely take the time to check it out. I’m pretty sure you can still see it on YouTube.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Timecode (2000)

Starring – Salma Hayek, Jeanne Tripplehorn, Stellan Skarsgard, Holly Hunter, Steven Weber, Leslie Mann, Saffron Burrows, Xander Berkeley
Director – Mike Figgis
Domestic Gross – $1,057,750
Running Time - 97 minutes

This is one of the most ambitious and difficult films I’ve ever seen. There are 4 stories being told that intertwine, but rather than edit them together the director filmed them all and showed them all continuously. The screen is split into quadrants with each one playing one of the perspectives. The audio is then played from whichever the Director has decided is important at the time. At times it is even playing more than one audio track at a time. It is exceptionally confusing because nothing cues you as to which one section of the screen you are listening to. That said the filmmaking is very impressive. All 4 perspectives were shot in continuous takes from a basic outline and improvised by all the actors. As a result the story was simplistic, but still fairly entertaining. If you are interested in the craft of filmmaking I would recommend watching this. If not, go ahead and skip it. Otherwise, you’ll end up with a splitting headache. Also, do not attempt to watch this on a small screen. It could be hazardous to your health.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Book Review – The Shack by William P Young (2008)

This book that started as a gift from Mr. Young to his children has now become a bestseller with over one million sold. Good for Mr. Young since after being turned away by all the non-secular publishers decided to self publish with two LA ministers. The Shack is the story of Mackenzie Philips whose daughter is brutally murdered and subsequently falls in to a deep depression. One year after his daughter’s murder he receives a strange letter prompting him to return to the scene of the crime signed by God. When he arrives he spends a weekend essentially conversing with the Holy Trinity. I suppose before I give any criticism I should say that I am not a religious person let alone a practicing Catholic. Having given that disclaimer I think that this is a great read for anyone who is and even those who may just want a little perspective. It’s only about 250 pages and could probably be read in a day or so. Like all the religious fiction I’ve ever read it does get a little preachy at times, but it also does not stick to any single dogma. Instead it espouses a love of all religions and a communion amongst them. I’ll pretty much recommend anything that does that. Just make sure you go in with the right frame of mind since I could easily have put this down had I not been.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Notorious (2009)

Starring – Jamal Woolard, Derek Luke, Angela Basset, Anthony Mackie
Director – George Tillman, Jr
Domestic Gross – $25 Million as of 1/22/09
Running Time - 122 minutes

I’m not sure I ever knew what the term lackluster meant. After seeing Notorious though I think I’ve got a handle on it. This is a reasonably factually biopic of Christopher Wallace aka The Notorious B.I.G. Clearly this is told from a less than objective source given that it was produced by Sean “Diddy” Combs and the late rapper’s mother so it tells a somewhat sunnier story than I’m sure the truth is. That said I was entertained from start to finish. Woolard was very good in his first role. Naturi Naughton and Antonique Smith were great as Lil’ Kim and Faith Evans respectively. Angela Bassett couldn’t seem to remember if she was supposed to have a Jamaican accent from minute to minute which is a little suprising given that she was the most accmoplished actress in the film. And Derek Luke was more or less wasted as Diddy, but hilarious each time he did the Diddy Dance. Overall, it was an entertaining, but mostly forgettable two hour effort. Wait for DVD on this one.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Book Review – Proven Guilty by Jim Butcher (2007)

Book 8 of The Dresden Files

Harry Dresden is what Harry Potter would be in 20 years after immigrating to Chicago and becoming a private investigator. Dresden is a wise-ass PI who protects the world (or at least the Midwest) from things that go bump in the night. Each novel is self-contained and could be read as a one off, but to get the full depth and background you’ll have to go in for the whole series. Or at least watch the DVD set from the too-soon-cancelled “Dresden Files” which aired on SciFi in 2007. In Proven Guilty, Dresden must accept his new position as a Warden of the White Council (the governing body of wizards) while balancing his loyalty to his friend Michael. The battle that ensues is epic. With each novel the Dresden character becomes a little more flushed out. Seeing as I’m already half way done with the next book I’m pretty sure I recommend not only Proven Guilty, but all of Butcher’s Dresden series.

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review - Taken (2009)

Taken (2009)
Starring – Liam Neeson & Maggie Grace
Director – Pierre Morel
Domestic Gross – Not Yet Released
Running Time - 93 minutes

What would happen if someone tried to kidnap Jason Bourne’s kid?! If you’re curious you should definitely check out Taken when it’s released later this week. The film starts out a little slow explaining how Bryan Mills (Neeson) came to live in LA. He is a former government operative who retired to reconnect with his daughter. He then begrudgingly allows his daughter to go to Paris on vacation. Then, as you’ve no doubt seen in the trailers, she is abducted. That’s where the fun begins. Mills goes apeshit over the next 96 hours in an attempt to get his daughter back. It is fast-paced and exciting and should be enjoyed on the big screen. Definitely check it out!

I’m Mike D and I approve this message.

Migration Habits of the Homeless

I spent last weekend in Seattle. Before the trip everyone I told that I was planning to go replied "Seattle, huh... Lots of homeless there." Not anything about the Space Needle or the mountains. No less than 6 people remarked about the homeless population in Seattle. During my trip I did notice quite a few including the gentlemen who puked all over the sidewalk at 10:30am. That's what I call making a memory. That aside though it didn't seem like there were THAT many. It did beg the question to me though... If you are homeless why would you stay in a place that is cloudy / raining 2 out of every 3 days?! Why not just start walking south? San Diego is about 1250 miles south. There they have sun and dry weather more than 2 our of every 3 days and the temperature never ventures in to dangerous territory (hot or cold). It just seems to make sense. Most people would love to live in San Diego, but have ties that keep them where they are or simply can't afford housing there. In general, the homeless lack strong ties to a region and can't afford housing anywhere so that aspect is moot. In conclusion, if I ever have the misfortune of becoming homeless I'm walking. From Boston it's just under 3000 miles.

I'm Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review - Rambo (2008)

Starring – Big Sly and no one else you really care about though Julie Benz of Buffy/Angel/Dexter fame makes a useless appearance.
Director – Also Sly
Domestic Gross - $42,754,105
Running Time - 93 minutes

Plot? What plot? This movie runs like a string of clips from YouTube featuring awesome explosions and bloody deaths. And it was AWESOME! I was watching this with my fiancé and when Stallone started talking she made me rewind twice because he was just grunting and grumbling through the dialogue. I swear that made it better because I didn’t even have to try and follow plot. I could just hear a grunt and then watch mayhem ensue. I especially enjoyed when Rambo takes over the enemy 50 cal and proceeds to annihilate legitimately a hundred plus guys. It was absurd and fantastic. In the final showdown with the big bad (who never speaks the entire film) he disembowels the guy with the famous Rambo knife. It was like Jem… Truly outrageous. (Yeah, I did). I hope Stallone is done trying to reboot franchises because while enjoyable they are still just caricatures of the once great characters he played a LONG, LONG time ago. I probably won’t watch this one again unless I can rally a bunch of boys together to watch while drinking. That’s about the only way it would be worth taking up another 90 minutes of my life.

~I'm Mike D and I approve this message.

Book Review - Eclipse by Stephanie Meyer (2007)

This is a review of Book 3 of Meyer's "Twilight" Series. I have read the previous two, but in keeping with only reviewing stuff I've recently seen / read I'll stick with Book 3.

If it's teen drama as well as a national sensation then you can be pretty sure that I'm going to check it out... Hell I've seen High School The Musical 1 & 2 (and I'll probably check out 3 to complete the voyage when it hits DVD). The "Twilight" Series is no exception. I'll admit I haven't seen the movie yet. Mostly because I can't get anyone to go with me and it would be super creepy for a man in his late 20s to go to this movie alone. Mothers would be clutching their daughters close or at the very least pointing to me and then warning them to "avoid that man". Regardless, I started reading the book in December and recently finished this 3rd book of the series. The first one was really good. It melded supernatural with some of the best teen melodrama I've seen in a while. So, if the first book rivaled the writing of the second season of "Dawson's Creek" or "Freaks and Geeks" then this third installment was "Saved by the Bell - The College Years". I swear it could have been ghostwritten by the writers of "General Hospital" or "Swan's Crossing" (for those who remember that). Add to that the title of the book came from one of the most groan-inducing dialogues is evidence that Meyer should have found a way to wrap this up in Book 1 rather than diving in to a pile of money Scrooge McDuck style with the ensuing 3 books. If I haven't made it clear it's awful... And I'll probably be reading book 4 soon just to appease my need to finish series that I've started.

~I'm Mike D and I approve this message.

Movie Review - Henry Fool (1998)

Starring - Thomas Jay Ryan, James Urbaniak & Parker Posey
Director - Hal Hartley
Domestic Gross - $1,338,335
Running Time - 137 minutes

I can't remember who recommended this movie. Lucky for them because if I do remember somebody's gettin' bitch slapped. Not only was this movie a bucket of suck, but it was a 2 hour and 17 minute bucket. It was completely all over the place. Somehow this guy who is being tormented by locals for being "half-a-retard" ends up a Nobel Laureate for some type of DH Lawrence type poetry. But along the way his friend Henry Fool bangs his mom and impregnates his sister who then throws boiling water in his face. Sound absurd? It absolutely was. Seeing as I've already wasted more than two hours on this I will waste no more except to say... "Don't... Just don't".

~I'm Mike D and I approve this message.

Why are mustaches creepier on red heads?

I read an article on MSN.com recently about how mustaches are back. They had pictures of Orlando Bloom attempting to look like a man sporting a mustache as opposed to being a hot chick again like in "Lord of the Rings". They also had Brad Pitt sporting a sweet stache for the new Tarantino film "Inglorious Bastards". Now, by no means do I consider myself in the same league as these gentlemen who are perpetually on People's Sexiest Men lists, but I am curious as to why when I post a picture of myself online with a well-grown stache the comments are uniformly accusing me of various acts of pedophelia? For the record the comments under the pics of Orlando and Brad were far less accusing and more like written orgasms. I'm just sayin...

~I'm Mike D and I approve this message.